Celebrating Today’s Youth
Thoughts from Sharon Carne
Let’s be mindful of the enormous contribution our youth make toward creating our collective future as we celebrate International Youth Day.
Let us also be mindful that statistics over the past several years show a growing trend in emotional and mental health challenges in all age groups and especially in our youth. In addition, there has been an enormous emotional toll from our collective experience over the past year and a half.
As we emerge from the grip of a global pandemic, many of us are beginning to focus on the opportunity of re-imagining how we live and work. Human beings are infinitely creative, especially our youth, who have not yet become as set in mindset or habitual patterns.
How do we embrace our youth with authenticity and grace?
I spent over 30 years teaching music to mostly young students, from 3 to 24. One of the delights and gifts of being a private music teacher is the close mentoring relationship that develops especially with those who are with you for years.
As I teach them musical skills, they teach me how to best support them. Here are some of the nuggets I learned:
- Listen with full attention and with an open heart and mind.
Every one of us feels validated when we are listened to with attention. - Communicate with authenticity.
Children and youth are spectacular lie and ego detectors. They easily become disengaged when there is lack of authenticity. - Develop emotional skills.
Music is essentially an emotional language. Understanding the communication and depth of emotion is part of the study. Many times, I also collaborated with parents to offer support in a challenging situation, like the death of a pet. - Values are essential.
Music study teaches responsibility, perseverance, concentration, and creativity. Communicating clear values offers security, safety, strength, and a template for boundaries. - Flexibility is important.
Family life is dynamic. Life is dynamic. Flexibility is essential to navigate challenges. - Tools for managing stress.
The competitive nature of achieving high grades adds enormous stress to our youth. Minimum requirements for entering university are extremely high. The high levels of stress I have seen in many young people over the years to achieve in school, sports, or music, can cause damage to their self-esteem and emotional health.
As we shift our educational systems and workplaces to focus more on collaboration than competitiveness, we will support health and wholeness more effectively.
Thoughts From Edward Carne
An Assault on Self Esteem
It is important to recognize that youth are under more stress, more duress, today, than at any other time in our history.
While one often thinks of youth as being the best times of their life, often that’s not the case. This is borne out in the fact that suicide is now the number 2 cause of death in our youth, and the rate is increasing.
So what’s the reason? As you would expect, there have been a lot of studies, and here’s some of what they found. In talking with teens who have attempted suicide, they have indicated a feeling of hopelessness, of helplessness. They felt like they had no control over the situation.
And COVID hasn’t helped. McMaster Children’s Hospital says it has seen a steady increase of youth in crisis since the COVID-19 pandemic began. According to the hospital, youth admitted for medical support after a suicide attempt has tripled over a four-month period, compared to last year.
Bullying, cyberbullying, abuse, and a detrimental home life were brought up, as was the forced isolation due to health restrictions.
And then there is the anxiety over failure – failure to get into university, failure on a test or exam, or in a relationship..
Largely, these factors can be broken down to an assault on their self esteem. Remember that our youth are more fragile mentally and emotionally than those of us who are older. They are still developing the tools to cope effectively, and so they sometimes respond in inappropriate ways.
It’s important to stop here and recognize that while these situations may lead to suicide, or thoughts of, most don’t take it to the extreme. That doesn’t mean that for many, the thoughts aren’t there, that the situation doesn’t exist, and the anxiety isn’t real.
So what can we do?
Over my decades in management, I have had the honour of working with many youth, and I remain proud of every one. I am always particularly gratified when someone that I have hired outgrows me, and the position that they were hired into. But I have always followed a simple philosophy – it’s better to build up than to tear down.
Our youth have enormous potential. I encourage you to embrace that, and to give them an opportunity within your organization. Hire them,whether for a summer position, or a permanent one, guide them, encourage them, and openly recognize their successes. But they are young and usually inexperienced. They will make mistakes. Acknowledge that in a positive way. Allow it to become an experience on the path forward. I know of one company that openly celebrated failure, for it was through their mistakes that the company was able to grow and excel!
If you have a story about working with youth, I’d love to hear it. Just send me an email with your experience.
Celebrating Today’s Youth
Thoughts from Sharon Carne
Let’s be mindful of the enormous contribution our youth make toward creating our collective future as we celebrate International Youth Day.
Let us also be mindful that statistics over the past several years show a growing trend in emotional and mental health challenges in all age groups and especially in our youth. In addition, there has been an enormous emotional toll from our collective experience over the past year and a half.
As we emerge from the grip of a global pandemic, many of us are beginning to focus on the opportunity of re-imagining how we live and work. Human beings are infinitely creative, especially our youth, who have not yet become as set in mindset or habitual patterns.
How do we embrace our youth with authenticity and grace?
I spent over 30 years teaching music to mostly young students, from 3 to 24. One of the delights and gifts of being a private music teacher is the close mentoring relationship that develops especially with those who are with you for years.
As I teach them musical skills, they teach me how to best support them. Here are some of the nuggets I learned:
- Listen with full attention and with an open heart and mind.
Every one of us feels validated when we are listened to with attention. - Communicate with authenticity.
Children and youth are spectacular lie and ego detectors. They easily become disengaged when there is lack of authenticity. - Develop emotional skills.
Music is essentially an emotional language. Understanding the communication and depth of emotion is part of the study. Many times, I also collaborated with parents to offer support in a challenging situation, like the death of a pet. - Values are essential.
Music study teaches responsibility, perseverance, concentration, and creativity. Communicating clear values offers security, safety, strength, and a template for boundaries. - Flexibility is important.
Family life is dynamic. Life is dynamic. Flexibility is essential to navigate challenges. - Tools for managing stress.
The competitive nature of achieving high grades adds enormous stress to our youth. Minimum requirements for entering university are extremely high. The high levels of stress I have seen in many young people over the years to achieve in school, sports, or music, can cause damage to their self-esteem and emotional health.
As we shift our educational systems and workplaces to focus more on collaboration than competitiveness, we will support health and wholeness more effectively.
Thoughts From Edward Carne
An Assault on Self Esteem
It is important to recognize that youth are under more stress, more duress, today, than at any other time in our history.
While one often thinks of youth as being the best times of their life, often that’s not the case. This is borne out in the fact that suicide is now the number 2 cause of death in our youth, and the rate is increasing.
So what’s the reason? As you would expect, there have been a lot of studies, and here’s some of what they found. In talking with teens who have attempted suicide, they have indicated a feeling of hopelessness, of helplessness. They felt like they had no control over the situation.
And COVID hasn’t helped. McMaster Children’s Hospital says it has seen a steady increase of youth in crisis since the COVID-19 pandemic began. According to the hospital, youth admitted for medical support after a suicide attempt has tripled over a four-month period, compared to last year.
Bullying, cyberbullying, abuse, and a detrimental home life were brought up, as was the forced isolation due to health restrictions.
And then there is the anxiety over failure – failure to get into university, failure on a test or exam, or in a relationship..
Largely, these factors can be broken down to an assault on their self esteem. Remember that our youth are more fragile mentally and emotionally than those of us who are older. They are still developing the tools to cope effectively, and so they sometimes respond in inappropriate ways.
It’s important to stop here and recognize that while these situations may lead to suicide, or thoughts of, most don’t take it to the extreme. That doesn’t mean that for many, the thoughts aren’t there, that the situation doesn’t exist, and the anxiety isn’t real.
So what can we do?
Over my decades in management, I have had the honour of working with many youth, and I remain proud of every one. I am always particularly gratified when someone that I have hired outgrows me, and the position that they were hired into. But I have always followed a simple philosophy – it’s better to build up than to tear down.
Our youth have enormous potential. I encourage you to embrace that, and to give them an opportunity within your organization. Hire them,whether for a summer position, or a permanent one, guide them, encourage them, and openly recognize their successes. But they are young and usually inexperienced. They will make mistakes. Acknowledge that in a positive way. Allow it to become an experience on the path forward. I know of one company that openly celebrated failure, for it was through their mistakes that the company was able to grow and excel!
If you have a story about working with youth, I’d love to hear it. Just send me an email with your experience.